Howdy Ghostfans…
Random midweek sh*t falling out of my head today…
Decided to give each one of the five voices running around up between my ears a chance to sound off today….I’ll make them do a quick introduction so you new peeps can know what the hell is going on…
(Did he just say he has ‘voices’ inside his head?)
Yep…doesn’t everyone? No? Huh…don’t you get lonely then? Sometimes I have to to work at getting them to shut up, but I wouldn’t trade it for the world….plus I can’t….I’ve tried…those bastards won’t get out!
Anyway, let’s get this started…first up…Dark Side.
Yeah…I ain’t doin’ introductions. I kick ass, find awesome stuff to do, and try to keep the other retreads from talking too much when women are around. The character of Barney Stinson on “How I Met Your Mother” was modeled after me….true story.
Check it, hookers!
It’s true. You aren’t wanted. That guy or girl that NEVER returns texts, calls or voicemails….yeah….they want you to run away. Plus, if you’re awesome…like me…they don’t deserve a second thought…piss on them.
I’m bored…and out. Dark Side rules!
********************************************************************
Next up, Pathos…
Hey there, I’m Pathos. I’m the passion and drive. The hope and the light in this strange condo of craziness here in Ghost’s head. The poet…the writer…the dreamer…
(Shut up already, and get on with it before you make us start ovulating, sock monkey!)
Dark Side is just so emotionally stunted sometimes.
Anyway, Ghost applied for a really great position inside of Giganticorp, and actually got an email back from the hiring manager saying that he has to wait until the closing date of the posting to review credentials and set interviews, but that he liked Ghost’s info. We got our hopes up for this one!
Also, we found out that we’ll be moving to that lab job for sure on 3rd shift on June 18th! Hello, Air Conditioning. Goodbye, sweaty, smelly, weirdly hazy factory floor!
Have had a few ladies chatting with us recently…
(They’re hollering at us, cause we’re dead sexy, and they want some Dark Side ‘forces’ applied to that ass!)
You’re such a cretin, Dark Side. They’re interested in more than our ‘lightsaber’ skills, you wretch.
Anyway, in closing, Ghost has been struggling with this Myastenia Gravis pretty significantly. Been hard to do much, other than get up, go to work, and sleep. Ghost has been playing a lot of Call of Duty, Modern Warfare 3 and watching Netflix.
(Yeah, that bastard has gotten pretty good with that sniper rifle, and now that he unlocked that Thermal Scope, it just ain’t fair…my Force abilities and Nerdboy’s logic/strategery, and we be smoking some fools!!!)
(We seeeeeee you! Sit your ass down, like our boy Subzero’s been telling you!!!)
You had your turn! Stop interrupting me!!!!
Jackass!!!
That’s about all I had. Thanks for taking the time to read us. We appreciate it.
(Fricking pansy!)
Sigh….
*******************************************************************
This next guy is difficult to deal with…his name is Everto. He represents the depressed, self loathing, self desctructive parts of Ghost….his inner demon…if you will. Those parts damaged by the teasing and bullying as a child…the parts that never will believe they deserve anything good in life. Most of the time….he just asks negatively charged questions….sort of mutters to himself.
(Yeah…Everto is a bit scarier than Peter Parker in a Black Spidey Suit.)
(Any Supernatural fans out there? Scary like this guy.)
Ever wonder if that part of you that’s capable of love can be broken…not like damaged and repaired, but destroyed? Rendered useless. Never get that ‘butterfly’ feeling in your stomach ever again?
Ever lose control of yourself..not like your temper, but have your body stop responding to basic commands? Every worry, every time you have a weird ache/pain/muscle spasm if you’re slowly crawling your way towards a wheel chair…or a coffin? Ever have trouble talking or swallowing…and worry that you’re not going to be anything but a vegetable…sitting in a corner in your own waste…just drooling on yourself…unable to do anything…but secretly be mentally sharp, and trapped inside of a body that doesn’t work…the most horrible prison ever imagined.
Don’t think I didn’t notice, Ghost. When you swallow…that stuff…accidentally going down the wrong pipe…yeah…that HAS been happening a little more often hasn’t it? Been sleeping an awful lot. Not hearing the phone ring…sleeping through alarms…those muscle spasms in your left tricep and forearm that were actually moving the whole arm…not quite as cute as the weepy right eye or the hand tremors while you’re playing Call of Duty are they?
Harder to laugh that sh*t off, isn’t it?
How about those migraines? You’re not supposed to be taking pain pills daily for them. That double vision and the accompanying headaches are a b*tch aren’t they? What are you going to do when you can’t bring your eyes to focus on that computer screen, huh?
Not like you can go back out in the shop and swing that sledge hammer now, can ya?
(The Knight says you’ve had enough time, demon. You’re finished.)
********************************************************************
Next up, our resident nerd…Prodigy…the guy who started naming off all of the men who’ve played Batman in movies…who’s currently researching grad school programs and chasing his damn tail around his lab trying to come up with some conclusions.
(Dammit, Dark Side! What happened to Prodigy’s picture?)
(***Side note explanation for Ghost’s mum… GTFO is short for Get The F*ck Out.)
“This entry cannot be completed as assigned, due to the constantly shifting variables concerning our future, and the difficulty in plotting a course when your destination is unknown and perpetually in motion.”
My apologies for the inconvenience this may have caused.
—Prodigy
********************************************************************
Bringing us home is the White Knight…Ghost’s resident defense mechanism and moral compass. He works to keep us from straying too far from the course…avoid traps…in general…he’s our internal boy scout.
Gentlemen…seriously…we need to come up with a plan and execute here.
We do not have a single area of our life under control, nor a plan for coping with the current issues at hand.
Dark Side…quit chasing women…put down the whiskey bottle, and get over here.
Pathos…(snap, snap)….get your heads out of the clouds and stop daydreaming…
Prodigy…Get out of the lab, put down the laptop…stop pacing, get over here and sit down.
Everto….get lost…we got this…if we need a tie breaking vote, we’ll toss a damn coin.
The rest of you…get the hell out of Ghost’s head…we got sh*t to do!
*******************************************************************
Hope your Hump Day is Happy!
(Dammit Dark Side!..Oh, screw it.)
Ghost out…
