GBF—Say Hello to Lemon…Again…

What’s up, Hookers?

Dark Side here.

Lemon’s blog has home remedies for all sorts of crazy sh*t!  Orange Jello kills cancer,  A shot of whiskey a day keeps the doctor away, and Chapstick prevents pregnancy. (Cause she is swallowing, TaDa!!!)

Actually none of that sh*t is in there.  But here’s an article that talks about how women who give blowjobs AND SWALLOW are SIGNIFICANTLY less likely to get breast cancer…TRUE SH*T!!!!  (For my ShortBus readers…click on those funny colored words in the last sentence….There you go, Sparkplug!)

Here’s Lemon’s blog, now that I’ve completely gotten sidetracked….What? Hummers?

(Don’t tell the Princess…she’ll be wanting this for her Sweet Sixteen!)

Seriously, here’s the blog…Check it:
http://allaboutlemon.com/2012/07/19/remedies-who-knew/

Ghost has some really good stuff he’s working on, but Prodigy is getting all OCD on making sure it’s perfect, while Pathos the Whiner-butt tinkers with the wording to “elicit maximum effect”….Shut the f*ck up, you damn nerd!

Anyway, Redbirds/sCrUBS series this weekend…maybe Chicago tries to claw back into the fray?  Oh, wait…didn’t I just read they’re trying to deal one of their best pitchers?
http://espn.go.com/chicago/mlb/story/_/id/8182551/los-angeles-dodgers-make-trade-offer-chicago-cubs-starter-ryan-dempster-says-source

CENTRAL	W	L	PCT	GB	HOME	ROAD	RS	RA	DIFF	STRK	L10	POFF
Cincinnati	52	40	.565	-	28-18	24-22	385	341	+44	Won 1	8-2	74.4
Pittsburgh	51	40	.560	.5	29-14	22-26	378	344	+34	Won 2	6-4	77.1
St. Louis	47	45	.511	5	23-20	24-25	441	377	+64	Lost 2	4-6	45.3
Milwaukee	44	47	.484	7.5	26-23	18-24	411	415	-4	Won 2	6-4	9.4
Chicago Cubs	38	53	.418	13.5	24-21	14-32	346	401	-55	Won 2	7-3	0.4
Houston	34	59	.366	18.5	24-21	10-38	357	444	-87	Lost 3	2-8	0.1

Guess they’re better than Houston…but they’re still pretending to be professionals.  Good thing that Chi-town has those first place Sox to cheer for.

Anyhoo…getting real close to Beer:30.  Or was it Whiskey O’Clock?  Hell, who cares?

Like Ghost says, “Be safe, Have fun.”

and like DarkSide’s Brother Outlaw says, “Take her easy…and if she’s easy, take her twice!”

Ghost out…

GBF…Listen Up, You Fat, Lazy Hookers…

Ghost here…

You know the drill…Guest Blog Friday…

Getting straight to it.  Here’s an article about why medical insurance for everyone isn’t the answer to our problems of poor health….read it, honestly think about it, and it may resonate for you.

DiseaseProof

Click on that pretty word above for the article.

Ghost out…

GBF…Say Hello to Nezza…

Ok…I live in Midwestern hell….the weather sucks here for completely varying reasons day to day.  Try to look at this chica’s blog for what it is….an adventure…not a reminder of how ordinarily sucky your life is….because you live near the Ghost….

How about that HOT breeze this afternoon?  The heat and humidity have even made fans useless today.

Featured Blogger Nezza in the house….I’m still waiting for some pics from the Boom Boom Room, Nezza…just saying…

Changes.

GBF! Say Hello to UndisputedLegal…

Howdy Ghost fans…

I’m not usually a fan of lists longer than ten items…by the time you get to thirteen you forgot number four.  It’s why I got tangled up with the boyscout stuff…somewhere between thrifty, trustworthy and kind…I forgot obedient, cheerful or dopey…wait, that was a dwarf…nevermind….

This list is pretty good anyway.  Had a lot of people hollering at me the last couple of weeks, and I think there are some really good things in here.

Check it out, here’s your guest blogger…I totally snagged this one last Friday…never been to this site before, and this is what caught my eye:

God bless our troops…may many more criminals have “accidents” like this.

Here’s your guest blogger UndisputedLegal:

http://undisputedlegal.wordpress.com/2012/04/20/30-things-to-stop-doing-to-yourself/

Ghost out…

GBF–Say hello to Jessica…

Howdy Ghostfans…

Well, hell…it’s June.  Seriously?  We’re nearly halfway to Christmas already?

Can’t f*cking wait for WalMart to put up the decorations….

(Whoop-Dee-Doo!!!!)

Today’s guest blogger writes and travels…travels and writes…so, check this out…

Definitely just got added to my bucket list of places to travel.

Without further ado…

http://havebaggagewilltravel.com/2012/05/14/dont-miss-morning-at-icelands-blue-lagoon/

Have a great weekend!

Oh yeah, Dark Side says, “Suck it, hookers!”

You Know She Is Crazy But Just When You Think You Hit The Bottom Of Her Craziness, You Discover There's A Crazy Underground Garage

Reblogged from snarkysnatch:

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My ex-beau says I'm crazy. But with all due respect, I'm not the one who dated me.  Fine.  Whatever.  You call it crazy, I call it channeling my creative side with a dash of being emotionally challenged.   So what, I'm not the first girl who had a guy walk away from dating her thinking he hit the bottom level of her craziness, only to discover there was an underground garage of crazy below. 

Read more… 2,178 more words

Howdy Ghost fans... No blogs all week as Ghost deals with the unexpected of the Spectre on his doorstep...you can bet there will be some new material soon, but all of a sudden getting a near 15 year old tossed at you every day has caused some unrest for the Ghost man. Anyway, Guest blogger Friday gives you Kat SnarkySnatch. She's crazy, but we love her. Her spin on women and their dating bullsh*t. Enjoy, and have a great Memorial Day weekend...if you aren't in the States...thanks for reading me, and I'll get the keyboard out and abuse it again real soon. Ghost out...

GBF—Ahh, Screw it!

Howdy Ghost fans…

I’m not happy with the second half of the “Raising a Real Man” list, so it’ll wrap up next week.

I couldn’t find a guest blog to feature, so Ghost is going to get all inspirational on you.

As you kick off this weekend, change your viewpoint.  Rather than looking at the next two days as a break from the 5 days of hell….look back at the 5 days whose ass you just kicked, and know that you’re stronger now for having gone through it.  Let Monday thru Friday get their rest, cause we’re coming back after them very soon!

Listen to one of my new personal mantras…being sick and dealing with life has been interesting….at times you want to sit down, cry and just go to sleep….other times, you’re so f*cking pissed off that you want to destroy everything you can get your hands on….and then, there’s the times where you want to do something, but have no damn clue where to even begin…

Ghost is here to stay…

Ghost out…

KoRn – Untouchables (2002)~*~ Here To Stay ~*~
This time, taking it away
I’ve got a problem, with me getting in the way,
Not by design
So I take my face and bash it into a mirror.
I won’t have to see the pain (Bleed, Bleed)
This state is elevating, as the hurt turns into hating.
Anticipating, all the f*cked up feelings again.

The hurt inside is fading
This sh*t’s gone way too far.
All this time I’ve been waiting
No I can not grieve anymore.
For what’s inside awaking.
I’m not, I’m not a whore
You’ve taken everything and oh I can not give anymore.

My mind is done with this
Okay, I’ve got a question.
“Can I throw it all away?”
Take back what’s mine
So I take my time, guiding the blade down the line
Each cut closer to the vein (Bleed, Bleed)

This state is elevating, as the hurt turns into hating.
Anticipating, all the f*cked up feelings again.

The hurt inside is fading
This sh*t’s gone way too far.
All this time I’ve been waiting
No I can not grieve anymore.
For what’s inside awaking.
I’m not, I’m not a whore
You’ve taken everything and oh I can not give anymore.

I’m here to stay (bring it down) [x4]
Bring it down [x4]
Gunna break it down [x7]
GUNNA BREAK IT!

This state is elevating, as the hurt turns into hating.
Anticipating, all the f*cked up feelings again.

The hurt inside is fading
This sh*t’s gone way too far.
All this time I’ve been waiting
No I can not grieve anymore.
For what’s inside awaking.
I’m not, I’m not a whore
You’ve taken everything and oh I can not give anymore.

Give anymore. [X4]

GBF…May 11th, 2012 edition…Say hello to Benzeknees…

What up, Ghost fans?

No, GBF isn’t Gay Best Friend…tardlings…that hairdresser Timmy has his own blog…..mhuhahahahaha!!!!  Just playing pimp.  You and your girlfriend are borderline distgustingly sweet together…I’m definitely happy for the both of you.

Anyway, it’s Guest Blogger Friday, Hookers!!!

You know this lazy bastard is stealing someone else’s work and taking the day off today….why are you surprised? (Hey, it took some time to type this sh*t and find some pics on Google to steal…f*ck you guys!!!)

(The gorilla is pimping, but the cat looks a little more comfortable.)

(Where I wish I was…the beach you pervert…not in her bikini bottoms…although… )

(Here would work too…)

(So, if you’re doing this later this weekend…it’s definitely a Ghost Approved activity…)

Anyway….when life starts to suck…take this next column’s advice.  Should put a big ass smile on your face….or make you want to change jobs for some of you perverts…

Have fun, and for my tardlings…click on the funny colored words below to read the link:

I Love My Job, I Love My Job.

Have a great weekend…

Ghost out…

Guest Blogger Friday…Say Hello…to the Dark Side…

Howdy Ghost Fans…

Thought since I’d been getting these types of questions recently:

How many people help you write your blog?

Who is Pathos?  Who is Dark Side?

How do you organize all of the people who write for you?

I figured that I’d explain.

It’s all me.  Except sometimes on Fridays.  Then I’ll say, I kidnapped someone and am reblogging their material.

There are 5 different personalities that make up the Ghost….yep, 5 different voices that run around up between my ears.  They all have names: The White Knight, Dark Side, Prodigy, Pathos and Everto.

The White Knight is the good guy, the guy who plays by the rules. Dark Side is my inner bad boy…very into having a good time.  Prodigy is my inner nerd, who can sit an talk about programming hearing aids and corrective hearing loss algorithms, and carry on debates about the possibility of time travel and worm holes.  Pathos is my inner passion and sensitive guy…he pushes everyone…he’s the guy who believes in finding love.  Then….there’s Everto….the demon.  He’s the self-destructive asshole…mean, vicious….the inner self-doubt, the tormentor.

Well, I wrote introductory pieces for each of them awhile back…

Since today is May 4th, it’s appropriate on InterGalactic Star Wars Day to re-run Dark Side’s piece.

Enjoy.

Oh, Go watch The Avengers.  The future Mrs. Ghost plays a major role, and the movie just f*cking rocks.  The Hulk steals the damn show though.  Puny little god.

Ghost out…

Origins of the “Dark Side”….

(If you were too dumb to figure it out…click on the funny colored words right above for the story.)

Guest Blogger Friday—April 27,2012 edition…

Suck it, hookers!

No blog for you!!!

Dark Side was here!!!