Howdy Ghostfans…
New year, blah, blah, blah…my actual first FB post of 2013 read as follows:
‘F*ck all y’all! 
‘
(Apparently, Dark Side had called first dibs on control of the smartphone that night.)
Here’s a quick little video to brighten up your day. “And you thought it was rain!”
Enjoy….or don’t …we do not care.
Suck it, Hookers.
Ghost out..
Howdy Ghostfans…
***WARNING: Political, Religious, and just down right Venomous and Fireball spitting time from the Ghost. Read on at your own peril. I’ve been working on this one for awhile…apparently since April. It hasn’t been easy, but I feel like it needs to be said.***
Read it all the way through. If not, you’ll miss the ENTIRE point.
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I’ve f*cking heard enough. The damned television, Facespace, Twitzone….ENOUGH!!!
Boycott Chick-Fil-A because their owner is anti-gay-marriage.
Boycott JC Penney because a lesbian is a spokesperson for them.
People who are religious are intolerant bigots.
Gays are going to burn in hell.
Every single one of you needs to shut the f*ck up…like yesterday.
(Ghost, you swear too much. If you really wanted to make a point, you’d be more articulate and respectful of your audience.)
F*ck you. Two times. Right in your egotistical, self-important, biased, prejudiced, know-it-all mouth.
I hope you just clicked off my page and never return. Wanna know why? Because you’re beyond help. The second that you stop listening to others and begin to believe that you are better than someone else, you have closed off your mind and are utterly useless in any meaningful discussion.
Want to know why I’m dropping F-bombs like a Jersey Shore cast member? Because it’s the only way to get through to the idiots on both sides of this war of ideology. So, sit down, open your mind, shut the hell up, and F*CKING THINK!
Gay, gay, gayer, gayest, gay-a-mundo! Chick-Fil-A, Civil Union, Election year, Homophobia!
(Slightly off-put by the modification of a Star Wars icon…but I’ll allow it.)
I’m not even sure where to kickstart this vomitous blog of rage, but I guess I better start making points.
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Both sides of this whole entire debate…are utterly f*cking wrong.
(But Ghost, CLEARLY the Gay and Lesbian community have RIGHTS that are being ignored!)
Bullshit.
The process is slow and flawed beyond comprehension, but in the end, “rights” are defined and established through the courts and through the legislature. Nowhere in the Constitution did it guarantee the right to marriage…FOR ANYONE.
In fact, the government only got into the “Marriage” business, to protect widows…plain and simple. Daddy dies suddenly, and Momma is left with the seven kids, and the bank is taking the farm and auctioning everything off….(Bankers were even douchebags 100-150 years ago.)
So, to protect these widows and these children, the government started recognizing RELIGIOUS UNIONS…aka MARRIAGES, and started granting survivorship/inheritance rights, tax breaks, etc…
Blacks and Women fought long and hard to get the “rights” that they had coming. If it’s truly meant to be, enough citizens will get behind the cause, elect the officials who will make it happen. Democratic process.
You want to be pissed at someone? Be pissed at these wishy-washy elected officials who dance around subjects that might interfere with their chances of re-election. (B*tching about politicians is a very steep cliff for another time…)
However, there will be those who do not agree with you. The Great American Melting Pot is a collection of different cultures, values, thoughts, traditions and ideas. Some minds will change soon, others will take time. But ANY citizen of this great country is free to donate his money to whatever causes they choose. If the owner of Chick-Fil-A donates money to groups who work to prevent the government from recognizing “gay marriage”, that’s his RIGHT. It’s his money, he’s free to manage it according to whatever moral/religious/personal code that he sees fit, provided he isn’t breaking any laws. Now if he were funding groups that were burning crosses, torturing citizens or intimidating persons…then you might have an argument.
The reason why the “Church folk” are resisting so hard, is that the government TOOK marriages FROM them. It was their ceremony and tradition in the first place.
(Rest assured, I’ll get to their asses in just a bit. My bone to pick with Christians is much larger than with the Pro-Gay-Marriage contigent.)
This article from an atheist is pretty appropriate here:
http://www.vice.com/read/hey-atheists-just-shut-up-please
When you sit up on a perch and look down at these “religious loons” these “uneducated hate mongers”, do you really think you’re going to cut any ice with them? The point the atheist blogger makes is: How arrogant do you have to be to believe that you can reason a person away from their faith?
Same applies here. Only taking the time to understand the other side, and showing them that you are listening will ever begin the dialogue that leads to change.
Shame on y’all for taking shots at religion. Digging up Old Testament Bible Verses about Rape Victims, Widows and Polygamy is NOT going to help attract support for your cause. In fact, it’s doing the opposite. Knock that sh*t off.
Many “Christian” denominations are moving toward an open acceptance of Gay marriage. All this hate and animosity just impedes that progress, if your goal is to achieve acceptance.
Just for the record, it’s not just the Christians you need to worry about here. Ever hear of Sikhs? Islam still considers homosexuality a crime, and in many Islamic states…the penalty is still death. Anyone read that book awhile back…oh, you know that one…that got all the press that everyone just HAD to read…about Afghanistan…you don’t remember THE KITE RUNNER? Yeah, well, basically for a man to have sex with other men…(even if raped) is such a horrible sin that it must never be spoken of.
Churches do a LOT of good. Many collect items to donate to women’s shelters. Many operate soup kitchens and run food drives to help stock up local food pantries. A great many churches run daycare programs that subsidize their tuition to help single parents.
Forget throwing out the baby with the bath water….this is an onslaught that is dragging that baby out of the tub to ceremonially torture and sacrifice him on the altar of self-importance.
Bottom line: “Attacking” religion to secure liberty, is wrong. It will NOT achieve the intended goal, and only sets back your cause.
Here’s an Old Testament Bible verse for y’all, which I’m pretty sure the Jews are still kicking around as well:
Proverbs 10:12- – -Hatred stirs up strife, But love covers all sins.
Think about it.
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(Sweet Lord, please get the media to start interviewing Christians with all their DNA strands in tact.)
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And now…to deal with you Christians…
You should be ashamed…because I am. To be tossed into the same pot with the rest of you…I am thorougly…embarrassed.
Here’s a verse you all should consider:
John 13:34 —–
”A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.”
Did I miss something? Nope, that verse ends…period. There isn’t an “unless you’re gay” tacked on the end of that verse. Straight from the MAN’S mouth himself…Jesus himself told you to love…EVERYONE!
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(This picture makes me want to hurt you.)
Matthew 18
1 At that time the disciples came to Jesus, saying, “Who then is greatest in the kingdom of heaven?”
2 Then Jesus called a little child to Him, set him in the midst of them,
3 and said, “Assuredly, I say to you, unless you are converted and become as little children, you will by no means enter the kingdom of heaven.
4 “Therefore whoever humbles himself as this little child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.
5 “Whoever receives one little child like this in My name receives Me.
6 “But whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in Me to sin, it would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck, and he were drowned in the depth of the sea.
7 “Woe to the world because of offenses! For offenses must come, but woe to that man by whom the offense comes!
Teaching hate to children…yeah, I’d say that’s contrary to the King of Love’s instruction.
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God does not hate “fags”. Want to know what he hates?
Read his book. It’s right there:
Proverbs 6:16–19
16 There are six things that the Lord hates, seven that are an abomination to him:
17 haughty eyes, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood,
18 a heart that devises wicked plans, feet that make haste to run to evil,
19 a false witness who breathes out lies,and one who sows discord among brothers.
Nope…”Fags” weren’t in there. But liars, cheats, and schemers sure as hell are!
Boy, if a Christian were really serious about saving our country from “DOOM”, they’d be focusing on reforming all those liars, cheats and schemers….where are there a bunch of those???
(Here?)
(Or maybe here?)
(How about here?)
(Oooooh, I know….How about HERE?)
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Reading this article should really make you think twice about yourself as a “Christian” and how you’re conducting yourself.
http://www.danoah.com/2011/11/im-christian-unless-youre-gay.html
How you treat others, is your biggest responsibility as a Christian. You are called to serve. You are called to suffer. What you do the the least of mankind, you do to HIM.
So rather than make plans this week for this:
Maybe you should be thinking about what the meaning of the season truly is:
The promise of redemption and love, regardless of what you do. Forgiveness and Love…for everyone, not just the select few…the elite.
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Bottom line: Attacking people to insure compliance with your moral code, is wrong. It will NOT achieve the intended goal, and only sets back your cause.
Here’s an Old Testament Bible verse for y’all, which I’m pretty sure that Jesus would be holding up as relevant:
Proverbs 10:12- – -Hatred stirs up strife, But love covers all sins.
Think about it.
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Ghost out…
Public Service Announcement:
A horrible tragedy occurs nearly every day during Hunting Season…but this type of incident…is extra heartbreaking…and something needs to be done about it immediately.
Every year, you see them out there…they wash their pickups BEFORE they go out hunting…they wear designer labels under their blaze orange vests and $200 boots out into the woods, with their customized firearms that they’ve only fired at a box full of clay pigeons….
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(Sir, your truck is too clean to go hunting.)
(Okay, hipster…don’t even think of picking up a gun. Go back to the coffee house, and get on your laptop…NOW!!!)
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Yes, these city-slicker, wanna-be outdoorsmen stomp off into the nightmares of America…
The sudden unexpected loss of life is always a terrible thing, but the damage…is truly heinous…
Yes, these poorly trained, over-dressed, wish they were manly-men, adventurers…shoot things…trees, rocks, muddy banks…and even each other….
When these friendly fire accidents happen…it is truly awful…so near the holidays…just tragic.
But this is NOT what we need to address…
Every year, many poor, innocent animals are slaughtered by idiots who know not the difference between a doe and a heifer…(note, doe = deer, heifer = cow.)
But the most tragic of all…is the massacre of mythical creatures…
The most tragic of all being…the unicorn.
These rare and legendary beasts are commonly slaughtered by would-be deer, elk or antelope “hunters”.
With Bigfoot populations in steady decline, and the Loch Ness Monster still unable to conceive, this is the next big issue.
With only 17 wild unicorns left…make that 15….no, 14 now….
These majestic beauties must be protected.
Will you step up….and donate the $1.00 a day, to help save the unicorns?
Operators are standing by.
Remember…only you can prevent Unicorn Slaughter.
Ghost out…
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(Special thanks to Adam and Eve for the inspiration…you frigging hippies!)
Howdy Ghostfans…
Hip-Mutha-F*ckin-Hooray, the erections are over….wait, no…we weren’t talking about Cialis were we?
I mean the ELECTIONS are over…but now that I think about it…we’re all still kind of getting screwed, so maybe the erections aren’t gone?
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Anyhoo…I’ve weighed in before on dating. Life has changed a ton since I first dove into the dating pool way back in the day…and in the mid-to-late-90′s, online dating probably started in the chat rooms. Can I get a shout out from the peeps who remember “A/S/L?”
Back then, my PC never got a break from downloading porn…unless I kicked everyone out to write a paper…then, my roommate had popped to order cable and had the Playboy channel, so our room was pretty popular.
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(Add in that there was usually about a gallon of vodka in that sumb*tch at any given time, and Ghost and the Cobra had it going on.)
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(If you know where I went to school….you’d know that this is total bullsh*t…there weren’t that many good looking girls at that school…hell, in that entire town….we’d have had to road trip to our rival school to line up this many hotties.)
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This was back when AOL and Netscape were running things. I can remember coming into my room after football or track practice…or from hanging out on the Co-Ed floor below us, and that damn ‘Little Porn Engine That Could’ would have several guys crowded around it. (HS graduation gift from the parents…most kids had to head across campus to the computer lab to write papers. There were maybe three computers total on my floor and maybe five or six in the whole dorm building.)
These bastards could pick the lock on my door with a driver’s license or credit card, and they’d hit the search engines. Back then, it took forever for images to download. So, you’d hear them screaming down the halls… Mike found naked pics of Alyssa Milano…So about 5 to ten minutes later, there’d be 5 to 10 guys huddled around the 13″ monitor…waiting as line by line was slowly revealed..like an old school peep show….Sometimes they’d get a hit, and a cheer would erupt…other times….you’d hear…That’s NOT Alyssa Milano, SON OF A B*TCH!!!!…..Hey, check to see if Christina Applegate has any nude pics…
(These ladies were hot, before Ghost even knew what that meant…and they’re still damn fine looking today…)
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Forget cell phones…pagers hadn’t even gotten big yet. Hell no, you were dialing 1-800 numbers and using calling cards for 5 to 10 cents a minute.
There was always one poor bastard on the suite phone…EVERY DAMN NIGHT…calling that girl from home…hours this fool would be at it….’I love you too, babe’….’I miss you too, babe’….Then he’d trot downstairs to spend the night in the Turkish/Jewish/Romanian/Filipino/Catholic/Nigerian/Whatever Flavor of the Month girl’s room on the co-ed floor below us….that bastard.
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(What up, Snowbunny?)
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(Ghost, what the hell does all of that have to do with online dating?)
Shut your face, infidel! I’m getting there.
Putting a picture on the internet required a scanner. These flat, large…very slow devices. The age of camera phones and instant web embarrassment were light years away at this point.
So, doctored photos and BS profiles weren’t even at issue yet. So, I’ve seen a lot of sh*t, and people used to strike up conversations in chat rooms and leave their spouses without a Facebook page or Online dating profile to screen.
When things hit me today, I worry that it’s because I’m old, and those old stories are fun to tell..so suck it…anyway, here goes…
So….
No wait, that’s not right…
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Okay, so I’m checking out this online dating thing, and I’m wanting to talk about the “goals” section.
Now some sites are geared towards finding specific kinds of girls: Fat ones, short ones, skinny ones, dark ones, light ones, ones that look like girls…but have boy parts, etc…
That’s not what I’m talking about.
What I’m talking about is the ‘Relationship Goal’ portion of the dating profile…and specifically the following options:
Hang-out
Short-term
Long-term
Dating
Friends
Intimate Encounter/Casual Sex
Casual Dating/Nothing Serious
Actively Pursuing a Relationship
Marriage
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Well, starting with the bottom…Marriage…(shudder)…When I see this on a woman’s profile, I hear, “I need to get married NOW, and start hatching babies.”
Sorry, but that sh*t scares the hell out of me, and just about every guy I know. You’d better be a solid 8, 9 or 10 to post that on your profile and still get inquiries.
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Intimate Encounter/Casual Sex…well, at first glance, you’d think that every guy would hop at this chance…but this reeks fishily of an Admiral Ackbar:
Is this a trick? Could a woman possibly be only interested in one thing? I have been hearing such things….however, most guys are immediately going to jump to the next conclusion: This chick is dirty.
Like an STD factory….or as we call them back home…chicks you’d meet downtown…(Unfortunately, the stats don’t lie, and about 1 in 3 adults back home are carrying around a ‘love bug’. Shout out to my boy, Nose…and those skanks he loves so dear!)
(Remember, Chitlins…Like Ms. F.O.B. says: Herpes is forever.)
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Hang out/Friends…
So what the hell is this option even doing on an online dating site? Really? I know plenty of people to “hang out with”. I have plenty of friends…well, there are many different kinds of friends…some who come over and take care of your pets when you’re out of town, friends you drink with, friends you play sports with, friends with benefits….
This just confuses me. I have plenty of friends. This is not the guy you’re looking for. Move along. Move along.
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Short-term vs. Long-term…
More confusing crap. Short term…didn’t I cover this under “Intimate Encounter/Casual Sex”? How short is short term? For the night? For the weekend? A month? 90 days? What’s the shelf life for a “short term” relationship?
Are there special requirements for pursuing one of these? Like do I need to have a terminal illness? Or be relocating, and just looking for something to help me get through til the move? Is there a permit or note I have to get from my doctor?
Oooh, or are they for like special events? I’d like to lose my virginity. I’d like a hot chick for a one night meaningful relationship, that I’ll never forget.
Or, I have a wedding to go to, would like hot, redhead for romantic steamy weekend at the beach. Relationship duration: Approximately 72 hours.
Can this thing be contracted? Okay, so there may be potential for this “Short Term” thing.
Then what the hell is “Long Term”?
And are the penalties for early withdrawal…like with banks and investments?
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(No he didn’t, dumbass…he said ‘Early Withdrawal’…but that sort of means taking it out early.
Heheheheh, nevermind. He just said ‘Pulling Out’ all smart like.)
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How long is long enough? 6 months? A year? 5 years? 20? This type of sh*t really needs to be laid out up front, because if you’re thinking: Til death do us part, and I’m thinking: Til I grow tired of her and blast her into space. We may have a problem.
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Casual Dating/Nothing Serious…
So let me get this straight? You want me to make an effort, call, talk, text, whatever. You want me to take you out to dinner, a movie, a concert, whatever. But, you’re not really looking for anything other than that?
Hit the bricks, freeloader…You’re as bad as guys who just tell girls whatever they want to hear, so they can have sex.
(Yes, you’re a dirty, worthless pile of garbage…just like a politician.)
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Which brings me to my last one:
Actively Pursuing a Relationship/Wants a Relationship
Is this the difference between sitting around b*tching about wanting to go on a date? Versus actually going out and meeting people to make it happen?
Or is ‘Actively Pursuing’ the key, sinister phrase?
When you google actively pursuing, these are your results:
Okay, I can deal with this.
Getting less okay with this…
More disturbing….yet, I’m a little turned on…
…And there it is! I’ve never met you, And you seem crazy, You creep me the f*ck out, Don’t stalk me, lady!!!
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Well, there you have it. Hope this helps…to either get you a date….or keep you outta jail you damn stalkers!
Til next time…Same Ghost Time…(Whenever the hell I get around to it…)Same Ghost Channel!
Ghost out…
Mornin’….hookers…and Good Morning, My Neighbors…
Dark Side and Everto here…and since we’re back on graveyard shift….(cause that’s what happens to your social life when you work thirds…you bury it.)…our motherf*cking Monday is about over.
But for you poor bastards who are about to start your day….F*ck it. Here we go:
Have a great day at work, hookers!
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Oh, hey…how was your weekend? Hold on, I have a book for you to read:
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To my co-workers who still aren’t getting the point:
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For my brutha from anotha mutha, Subzero….I can’t believe the same sh*t happened to the same guy…twice….da, da da, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah:
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Yes, yes! Amen! Anyone up for all three?…we’re negotiable on the order.
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To those ladies who think they were put here to enhance our lives, just by allowing us to bask in their glory…this one’s for y’all…and your little dog too!
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And in summary….
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Suck it, hookers!
Dark Side and Everto are outta here!
Ghost out…
Howdy Ghostfans…
Well, you rotten dirty, perverted scoundrels…Yeah..I missed you too.
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Been busy as of late. Haven’t really had a ton of time for much…work, eat, sleep, repeat. What little free time that I’ve had has been spent with my kids, so dating hasn’t really been even on my radar.
So, Back in May, my oldest finally decided to join the DarkSide…Catching an inbound freshman was easier in some ways than I expected…harder in others.
I thought I’d share a conversation I had with his blessed little heart.
Spectre: I have to remember to pick up a ticket to the Homecoming Dance on Saturday.
Ghost: You going ‘stag’?
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Free Prodigy Vocabulary lesson:
‘Going Stag’:
stag /stæg/ Spelled [stag]
IPA ,noun, verb, stagged, stag·ging, adjective, adverb
noun
1. an adult male deer.
2. the male of various other animals.
3. a man who attends a social gathering unaccompanied by a woman.
4. Informal . stag party.
5. a swine or bull castrated after maturation of the sex organs.
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DarkSide Unsolicited Comment:
“Dictionary.com…hookers. It’ll make you less f*cking retarded!”
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Spectre: Uhm…I’m going with two girls and meeting a couple more there…so, I guess that I’m going…’Pimp’?
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Ghost: (Laughing) Good one…I like that. So, when did you decide to go?
Spectre: Awhile ago…I told you.
Ghost: No, you didn’t. Wanna know why?
Spectre: I know I told you. Why do you think I didn’t tell you?
Ghost: Correction. I don’t THINK you didn’t tell me…I KNOW you f*cking didn’t tell me…and THIS is why:
1) I started busting your ass about this like 8 weeks ago. If you had asked a girl, you have to make dinner reservations, get flowers, and arrange transportation… since your monkey ass can’t drive.
(Gonna have to wait to take your date like this til next year, kid!)
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2) I have to work this weekend. So I would have to alter my sleep schedule since I’m on thirds.
3) I only forget stupid crap…like married women’s first names, keys in the ignition of cars, and any promise made to get people to leave me alone while I sleep.
Spectre: (Indignant and a ‘tad’ sarcastic) I’m sorry. Well, I guess next time, I’ll shout my plans from the mountaintops…
Ghost: Don’t take that tone with me. I’ll kick your ass. I’ve put in quite a few hours at the shop this week where they’re talking layoffs, I’ve been sleeping like sh*t, and the muscles in my right calf haven’t stopped spasming in 13 days. If you had told my dumb ass, the first question out of my mouth would have been, “What are you wearing?” Have you got dress shoes? A shirt and tie? A belt? Motherf*cking dress pants? Who’s ironing that sh*t?
Spectre: Oh….Yeah…I don’t have anything to wear.
(She might be able to pull this look off, but YOU, my son…cannot.)
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Ghost: It’s Thursday, Jabroni. I have to go to work tonight. Can’t get you clothes tonight. You have a football game Friday, and I’m working til 7am Saturday. Then, you have practice from 8-11am. I’m going to have to stay awake, and help you go get this stuff and get that mop on your head addressed.
Spectre: (Interrupting) Well, compared to all the guys on the team, this is really short…
Ghost: Well, they aren’t my kids, and if their parents don’t care if their kids look like crap and are having sex with anything that moves, that’s their business…You planning on shaving sometime this month by the way?
Spectre: Yesssssssss. Damn, dad.
Ghost: I’ll stop busting your ass, when I believe you’re going to be able to take care of yourself when I’m dead.
(Is that a Ghost Stripper?….Nah, Ghost is done dating those…even in the afterlife…)
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Long story short, We saw my very un-gay hairdressing pal named Timmay and visited Ms. Voodoo’s consignment spot…got this kid some threads, a belt and shoes, and sent his little monkey ass off to the dance…where he seemed to have a good time.
I gotta say this…the little bastard cleans up pretty well. I was actually sort of impressed when he got all dudded up.
Sh*t. There may be hope for this kid yet.
Ghost out…
What’s up, b*tches?
Long time no chat…Well, that’s just cause I got sh*t to do…
You think I just sit around and worry about entertaining you?
Anyway, I didn’t think there would really ever be a debate over this, but I have received information that is making me reopen the debate over sexiest dance ever. The reigning champ has some work cut out for her, so here goes.
Time for y’all to make the call:
Which sexy wiggle is better?
The defending champ: Kate Upton, model/actress doing the ‘Cat Daddy’.
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Challenger #1: Michelle Jenneke, Australian Hurdler doing her warm-up pre-race “dance”.
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Finally, Challenger #2: Salma Hayek, actress, doing her reptilian table dance.
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What do you think Ghostfans? All I can say is…Uhm…Damn…
Well, if all that wasn’t enough…we’ll give the Champ a curtain call with her “Teach Me How to Dougie”:
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Suck it, Hookers!
For Ghost, this is DarkSide…
Ghost out…
This girl clearly needs to never pass on her DNA. Just saying …
Howdy Ghostfans…
If you’re not a UFC fan, you probably could care less about this article. However, I’m going to write it anyway for the 7 to 135 people who may read it.
Bones vs. Hendo…well…it ain’t happening. If it does, it may be sometime next year. For those of you who may not know, and for those who might have forgotten…Jon Jones is the current UFC Light Heavyweight champion.
Before you can understand exactly what happened, and how significant this event is…here’s some backstory:
Via Wikipedia:
Jonathan Dwight Jones (born July 19, 1987), known professionally as Jon Jones, is an American mixed martial artist from Endicott, New York. He is the reigning UFC Light Heavyweight Champion.
Jon Jones, the youngest UFC title holder in history, entered the organization after fighting professionally for only four months. In May 2012, he was ranked as the number one light heavyweight fighter in the world by various media outlets, as well as the #3 pound for pound fighter in the world. He is currently ranked the #2 pound for pound fighter in the world according to ESPN.
THE YOUNGEST UFC TITLE HOLDER IN HISTORY!!! Almost an understatement here. This guy stormed onto the scene and pulled the rug out from under well established guys, who had fought and scrapped to get their shot at the title. This guy comes to town with very unorthodox striking (spinning elbows and back kicks) and a freakishly lanky physique, which gives him a very looooooong reach. In the striking game this is one thing…but as far as submissions go, he can apply certain holds from very odd angles because of that extra length. Talented as the day is long, and the sky is truly the limit for this young man.
Trying to get inside his reach is trouble….once you get in there, he can tie you up like an octopus and choke your lights out…
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Why it isn’t Dana White’s fault:
Dana White is the mastermind behind the UFC. A completly outlawed and bankrupt concept here in the States, this guy makes rule changes to protect the fighters and to get the legal sanctioning bodies to approve the sport, and with the aid of his financial backers, he has built the modern gladiator combat arena for the masses.
Dana cusses and swears and calls people out publicly. And the fans love him for it. In an age of political correctness and blantant lies and bullsh*t from our politicians, bosses, law enforcement, etc… This guy will just drop an F-bomb and tell you exactly what he thinks…like this:
* “Hell, forget about college. I barely finished high school.”
* “I don’t need a bunch of idiots out in Wall Street – who have no idea what they’re talking about and don’t know anything about this business – telling me how to run it.”
* “Who really gives a ##### at the end of the day what the financials are? I want to talk about the next fight. Who does everyone want to see fight, why do we want to see them fight?”
For Dana, MMA and the UFC is what HE is. He runs the best MMA organization on the planet, and is arguably one of the biggest fans. Which is why he was completely floored by the events of the last few days.
Back to Jon Jones’ career… He went pro, and started fighting in smaller promotions….in April of 2008…over the next three months, he’d fight six times…and win all six. Knocking out or submitting EVERY opponent. The UFC called, and with only a TWO-WEEK notice, he was an injury replacement on a UFC Pay-Per-View.
This guy gets his title shot in March of 2011, AS AN INJURY REPLACEMENT, and wins. He goes on to take out the next three opponents the UFC throws at him. He was scheduled to fight Dan “Hendo” Henderson on September 1, 2012, but Hendo goes down with a tear in his MCL.
Dana White gets the news, and scrambles…no one will fight Jon “Bones” Jones on 8 days notice….save one man…Chael Sonnen.
This guy is arguably the biggest trash-talking, asshole in the UFC…maybe even on the whole damn planet.
This guy is universally hated, and justifiably so. He gets busted for using performance enhancing drugs, charged with money laundering, and talked sh*t to the ENTIRE COUNTRY OF BRAZIL prior to facing the baddest man on the plant, Anderson “The Spider” Silva….who summarily kicked his ass after promising that Chael wouldn’t leave the ring under his own power, and that he’d be missing every tooth from his head.
But even this asshole recognized that this was an opportunity to cement himself in the record books, and SAVE a UFC event.
Even though Sonnen is a grade A douche…he was willing to fight. Hell, this prick offered to fight the same night. His reply to Dana was to the effect that he’d get on a plane right now and fight tonight if he was needed.
Clearly…Sonnen, is not to blame. Furthermore, Dana is in the clear, as he went to the cupboard and came up with a solution to keep this thing together.
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Why should we give a damn about Dana White and rich guys who are undoubtedly going to get paid off this event?
Simply…you shouldn’t. Nor should you care about Jon ‘Bones’ Jones wallet either. He just signed a deal with Nike. He’ll be just fine. He gets a cut of the Pay-Per-View shares as well.
Dude’s gonna get his $$$.
But this is such a big deal because:
People do this for a living. Not all the fighters on this card are wealthy. UFC fighters don’t work for the UFC. They don’t have pension plans, 401Ks or any guaranteed pay. They are independent contractors who get paid if they fight. According to Dana, there were about 20 fighters and about half a million dollars in prize money for them to earn. A lot of these fighters only get about three to four fights in a year. Here’s an idea of how the cash gets distributed:
Unofficial earnings from the last PPV, UFC 150
Pepsi Center – Denver, CO
Estimated Attendance: 15,008
Estimated Gate: $650,000
Donald Cerrone: $183,600 ($30,000 to show, $30,000 win bonus, $3,600 from Guillard for missing weight, $60,000 Fight of the Night bonus, $60,000 Knockout of the Night bonus)
Jake Shields: $150,000 ($75,000 to show, $75,000 win bonus)
Melvin Guillard: $88,800 ($36,000 to show, fined $7,200 missing weight, $60,000 Fight of the Night bonus)
Dennis Bermudez: $76,000 ($8,000 to show, $8,000 win bonus, $60,000 Submission of the Night bonus)
Benson Henderson: $60,000 ($30,000 to show, $30,000 win bonus)
Frankie Edgar: $51,000
Yushin Okami: $46,000 ($23,000 to show, $23,000 win bonus)
Ed Herman: $31,000
Nik Lentz: $30,000 ($15,000 to show, $15,000 win bonus)
Max Holloway: $12,000 ($6,000 to show, $6,000 win bonus)
Michael Kuiper: $12,000 ($6,000 to show, $6,000 win bonus)
Jared Hamman: $12,000
Erik Perez: $12,000 ($6,000 to show, $6,000 win bonus)
Chico Camos: $12,000 ($6,000 to show, $6,000 win bonus)
Justin Lawrence: $8,000
Dustin Pague: $8,000
Buddy Roberts: $6,000
Eiji Mitsuoka: $6,000
Tommy Hayden: $6,000
Ken Stone: $5,000
Some of those guys did pretty well…wait, here’s what UFC fighter Joe Lauzon had to add to this discussion:
Not only has this screwed over all the fans that bought tickets, non refundable airfare, took off work, made arrangements, etc… but think of all the fighters. Fighters that put in full camps, flew people in that helped them trains, etc. By the time I am actually fight, I spend close to 20k between corners, flights, expenses, coaches, etc…
Holy crap. That’s a lot of expenses…and then, they don’t get to work? F*ck!!!
Here’s where Dana weighed in on this:
It’s major, major deal. We lose a lot of money, money that’s already been spent. We’re eight days out. We’ve spent tons of money on this fight. How long and how far it goes and how bad it hurts I don’t know because it’s the first time we’ve done it. Many people, from fans to PPV distributors, TV networks, sponsors, and more importantly fighters who are working hard to support their families and build their careers are hurt badly by this…
Not only will these fighters be hurt, the damaged relationships with the sponsors and future events hosts (I.E other casinos and event centers) will potentially hurt future events draws and cash for fights purses. Aborting one show will send ripples and shockwaves through future events.
Going beyond the fighters….there are the people of Las Vegas to consider.
Las Vegas…where better than 1 in 4 people work in a service industry, is currently experiencing between 12.1 and 13.7% unemployment….depending on whose lies…cough, cough, erm, statistics you are using. So, with the holiday weekend and the UFC event, you can bet there were several single moms who were counting on tips and possibly some overtime or extra shifts from this event to make rent.
So this is a world class clusterf*ck. People are going to be hurting from this.
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So Ghost, get to the f*cking point here….Who’s to blame?
Shockingly…it’s simply the fault…of one man…and his trainer.
Jon ‘Bones’ Jones and Greg Jackson.
They refused to fight the replacement fighter, Chael Sonnen. Who was going to fight on 8 days notice…and move up 20 pounds to the next higher weight class. Jones had trained a full camp, and would be holding a significant reach and size advantage. But he wouldn’t fight.
He would toss out reasons, like there wouldn’t be a big draw, and his Pay-Per-View cut would suffer. Or, he just wouldn’t feel comfortable preparing for a new fighter in 8 days.
Since Chael Sonnen just was a part of the main event at the HIGHEST grossing UFC event EVER…I’m sure the PPV buys would have been there….hell, Chael…ever the trash talker, even volunteered to give his entire pay to Bones…just to get the fight. He said something to the effect of, I don’t need to fight you…I just want to kick your ass. I get paid a lot more than you, and if it’s money you’re after, it’s there.
I don’t know whether he was scared to fight Chael, or it was purely financially based….but either way, it was one of the most selfish decisions in sports in recent memory.
Said Hendo, his scheduled injured opponent:
“This is the first time that the champion wouldn’t step up and fight, and I was pretty shocked to hear that. It’s not like he’s injured. It’s unbelievable to me that he wouldn’t take that ‘the show must go on’ attitude. If there was any way I could have gone, and any way that I thought I could give myself a chance to compete, I would have done that.
Heal up, Hendo. The UFC fans want to see you back in action soon.
Sorry Chael…you just lost your title as Most Hated Man in the UFC…Guess you’ll have to start insulting a new country to try to get that back.
Jon ‘Bones Jones…for a guy who broke into the UFC on two weeks notice, and who got his title shot due to an injury pullout….you sure picked a fine time to start having a problem with it.
Ghost out…
Howdy Ghostfans…
Read this article :
In an era of steroid cheats, DUI arrests, marital infidelity and domestic violence amongst our pro athletes, Lamarr Woodley just stood up and gave you an example to show your kids of how to do things the right way.
Even a die-hard Browns fan has to tip his cap here …I still hope you guys lose every game this year (except against the Ravens, beat their asses!)
But, way to represent your hometown, your team and men in general. Much respect.
Ghost out…
(Did anyone see Cleveland knock off Green Bay in the Pre-season?)
